Relationship advice columnist Roudy Romeo has been there and knows how to help. He dishes out the truth just as he sees it in our newest addition to The Socialite offering readers life, sex and relationship advice in his signature sharp style. Check out this week’s edition entitled The A-Z of First Dates…
Dear Roudy Romeo
I have just met this guy and we have been chatting a lot lately via text, and now he has just asked me out on a date. I am really nervous. I have not been out on many dates and am a shy girl but we have been hitting it off well in our messages. It is the face to face that I am concerned about. Please help.
Starting at A
Dear Starting at A
It is not uncommon to feel nervous before a date, even if it is further into the relationship. I can assure you that he is probably just as nervous as you areand he will be feeling the pressure to impress. Let me help guide you through a few do’s and don’ts to help ease you nerves and ensure that you make him ask you on another date again and again, that is if you at least say yes.
Now it is well known that women take for.ev.er to get ready. I have a friend who often says that perfection takes time. Nonsense. Au Natural is the way to go, if he has asked you out over a text then he has asked on the basis of who you are as a person. Be yourself; he has asked you out, you need to be comfortable in your look and confident in yourself. Although you need to be true to yourself, there is no harm in dressing to impress, make his jaw drop and his eyes pop. Be sure to find out the dress code of where you are going, you do not want to be over or under dressed for the occasion. Focus on the evening ahead so be sure to leave your phone in your purse, you can always chat to your friends afterwards, it is just plain rude to be on your phone constantly when out in someone else’s company.
Make sure to greet him open-heartedly, a generous hug is often a good ice breaker and also gets the first contact out of the way. The best thing about a hug is that you get one back right away. You need to show your interest in the evening, not overly enthusiastic but that you want to be there. When you have finally settled down and your nerves have subsided ever so slightly then just go with the flow, this business of thinking about what to say is also nonsense. You chat every day so why should it be different now? Keep the conversation light hearted and laugh easily. Men like to talk about themselves just as much as women, throw the conversation his way every now and then, it will show your interest in him and he will appreciate it.
Just as you have done your entire life, eating is a necessity. It is well known that if you do not eat, you will die. Order as if you were out with your own family. You will want to try stay as polite as possible without being too stiff and boring, if you do need to let out a burp then keep it quiet. It is important to not only respect your date but also yourself and you only want positive feedback. Perhaps the most pleasant memory I take from my dates is her smile, it is probably the easiest way to tell if someone is enjoying themselves and will reassure your date that the night is going well. If you think that he is too confident about the evening’s proceedings then playfully tease him, this will lower his ego and make him work a little extra, just in case he forgot that he asked you out, not the other way around. Use this to vary the conversation onto a topic you may be more comfortable with without verbally abusing the poor guy.
When the night is over and it’s time to go home, wait a few moments in the car with him. You don’t want to rush out of the car and potentially miss out on the deal breaker. If he leans in for a kiss then make it exceptional, but only one. That one single kiss will be the only thing on his mind for the rest of the time until you see each other again and certainly be a new topic of conversation. And when you wake up in the morning and yesterday is all that you can think about, wait for him to contact you first, he will. Have zero worries, if you were yourself and had a great time then there is no reason for him not to.
Here’s to spelling out love